Tuesday, March 30, 2010

past or present?

I've heard a million times lately whats in the past is in the past, its done, its over, you can't change it.  That's true to a point, you can't change it, but is it truly over, is it really done and forgotten?  Is the past merely gone and never to return?  I don't believe it, I can't accept that answer.  This house has plenty that was done in the past, hasn't been touched in years, hasn't been thought about. But everyday I see it, I come across the past here all the time.  Decisions that were made years ago are constantly affecting me and what I need to do.  The crazy wiring, the bizarre framing modifications, the smoke stains that kept coming back again and again.  It would have been a heck of a lot easier to get something new and not have to deal with some of the wacky stuff I've seen here, but the satisfaction and the fun of making into something better than new is all part of the experience and its how you learn and grow. And I'm convinced new isn't always better.  I've asked 'why' a few times, I've bashed my knuckles, I've been brought to tears in frustration, but without those things and more there wouldn't be personal satisfaction from making it right, and everyone noticing and learning that a little TLC can transform something into what no one thought it would be. So I am sticking to my guns, the past quite often is just as much the present, no matter what you tell me. Every day I deal with the past, to me, its so close and real.  I can't escape the past, I wake up with it, I see it all day and I go to sleep with it. I love it and sometimes stresses me all at the same time.  It would just be better to me if the good parts of the past could be brought to the present, heck I'll even take some bad parts too and work to make them good.  If you still think of the past that much, you have to ask yourself whats keeping it from being part of the present?  I hold onto the fact that more often than not, something that was great in the past can be restored to something amazing in the present, and be an outstanding example for the future.

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